Fartleks

Fartleks are twisted nuggets from the recesses of my mind. I will emit a Fartlek daily. Current Fartleks are:

1. I run long distances because I have no short term memory. (Posted 8/1/13)
2. Is it my imagination or do I run faster after I have eaten pizza? (Posted 8/2/13)
3. Probably my biggest successes in life are that I have run 10 marathons, raised 4 relatively normal children and I have perfected my ability to take a really good dump. (Posted 8/3/13)
4. I have perfected the ability to run and text at the same time. I have run into a tree, tripped over a motorcycle, but I WILL NOT give up the right to be heard. (Posted 8/4/13)
5. I dip my toe in the waters of excellence and sometimes I feel like all i get is a wet toe. (Posted 8/5/13)
6. Why is it that I can run 26 miles but can barely swim a lap. Feels like controlled drowning to me. (Posted 8/6/13)
7. I'm just a hamster on the wheel of life. I may not be going anywhere, but I sure am running faster. (Posted 8/7/13)
8. A great line to tell your girlfriend AFTER you have just run a Tough Mudder: 'I fell in a pile of you and got love all over me.' (Posted 8/8/13)
9. Not a good line to use while proposing: It ain't love but it ain't bad. (Posted 8/9/13)
10. I keep forgetting to not forget that dog that is running after me. (Posted 8/10/13)
11. Great name for a Painting Contractor owned by a Christian: Repaint and Thin No More - Not sure what this has to do with running! (Posted 8/11/13)
12. Sorry to pester you but sometimes I feel like a bug on the windshield of life. Splaaat? (Posted 8/12/13)
13. When you run, run backwards so you think you are almost done. (Posted 8/13/13)
14. I'm just a runner who likes to fart.....or a fart who likes to run!!! (Posted 8/14/13)
15. I know that it is the early bird that catches the worm, but I would much rather stay up until midnight and have pizza. (Posted 8/15/13)
16. I have dunlap disease. I dunlapped you around the course!!! (Posted 8/16/13)
17. Try running a mile on one leg. It'll feel like a 1/2 Marathon. (Posted 8/17/13)
18. A good reason why I run in the evening: Not even the sun wants to get up at 4 in the morning. (Posted 8/18/13)
19. A runners motto: If miles were money, I'd be a rich man. Though miles aren't money, I'm still a wealthy man. (Posted 8/19/13) 
20. My daughter says that my legs look like Vanilla Bean Ice Cream. This is not a compliment. She was saying that my legs are very white w/spots. (8/20/13)
21. Running your 1st Marathon is like going on your 1st date. You think you are prepared but your body is still going through a lot of changes. (8/21/13)
22. Jesus was a runner. He ran with compassion: from hypocrisy. He ran with the mighty wind of the Word. He ran towards death that we might run towards Life. (8/22/13)
23. Christians take life too seriously. When the world sees less judgement, more joy, less grumbling, more grace, it might want what we have to offer. (8/23/13)
24. There is something about running that a-tunes out mind to our body, making beautiful music; in one a-chord. Running's often when I am closest to God. (8/24/13)
25. There are two things that happen when we pray: Heaven rains down and all hell breaks loose. Be prepared for the BLESSINGS of both. (8/25/13)
26. A runner does not discriminate. S/he will go anywhere to enjoy solace and peace on the road. (8/26/13)
27. Never teach a runner to dance. It's a waste of time and it irritates the other runners. (8/27/13)
28. There will come a time when they will paint you like a clown and put you in the ground. For now, use that ground for running toward your goals and for your Lord. (8/28/13)
29. Did you know that 5 out of 6 doctors recommend that you do your fartleks before you run? (8/29/13)
30. You know that there is something wrong with this picture when, at a race, you see more men peeing behind the porta potty than in the porta potty. (8/30/13)
31. You know there is something wrong with this picture when, during a 4th of July 5 mile race, you see a 10 foot running Uncle Sam fall flat on his face. (8/31/13)
32. Our spiritual walk is actually a spiritual run. God asks us to run with purpose and perseverance and give Him our all. (9/1/13)
33. If you run a Tough Mudder, does that mean you've run amok? (9/2/13)
34. 
    

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